


Not Good Enough

by SaritAadam



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Blackwing Dirk, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Mention of Physical Abuse, This is what my depressed and tired self write at midnight sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 17:06:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9133306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaritAadam/pseuds/SaritAadam
Summary: Dirk just wanted to not be alone anymore.Set before the show, during the time when Dirk was with the CIA.





	

He was scared and all alone.

His life hadn't been a good one, his family was poor and different and never fit in. But at least they were all together.

Here he was alone.

He didn't meet other kids his age. He knew there was other kids, but he wasn't allowed to meet them. He just wanted someone to play with, to be friend with. The only people he met weren't friendly. They were grown-ups, doctors and scientists. They asked him or made him do stuff, never seemed satisfied or disappointed with the result, and left him in his room, alone again.

But Riggins was different. He didn't come every time, but when he did he was nice, sometimes he brought some sweets, or new toys. And he seemed to care, about the results, about the boy. He talked to him, like real conversations, about the boy's feelings and family. And he was so _proud_.

“You're a winner, Svlad.” Riggins said. “You're a winner, and you will make the world a better and safer place with your abilities. You'll see.”

One day, he asked Riggins if he could meet the others like him. The soldier looked at him with so much sadness in his eyes while he answered no. So he never asked again, and he worked so hard on his abilities so Riggins would still be proud. He just didn't want the only person to care to leave him.

Riggins came to see him more and more often, and seemed really happy with his progress. But one day, all changed. It wasn't Riggins who was facing him, asking questions. It was an other soldier, a much more older one. And Riggins was standing behind, in the shadow.

The much more older soldier didn't seem impressed or happy with the boy's abilities.

After that, Riggins never came alone anymore, didn't talk to the boy. And the exercises were more intense and more painful. But he never managed to do what they were asking him, and it frustrated them. They kept asking him why he didn't do what he was told, why couldn't he do that, it was for the greater good-

“SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” he said one day, his voice loud. He didn't know his voice could be that loud. “IT'S NOT GOOD! IT'S NOT WHAT THE UNIVERSE WANT! HOW CAN IT BE GOOD?!”

The much more older solder was angry. Riggins didn't look at the boy.

Once the exercises over, he led in his bed. He didn't play with his toys and barely ate anymore. When he had enough strength, he cried. It was too difficult here, the experiences too painful. And he couldn't make it, couldn't make the world a better place. And he had disappointed Riggins.

So, when the Universe brought him an exit door, he fled.

**Author's Note:**

> And you know... Happy new year :D


End file.
